Saunders Law Group

Methods to keep parental conflicts away from the children

Everyone living in the home is impacted when the parents decide to divorce. While adults in the home can find ways to cope with the changes that are coming, children often have troubles. Parents must be prepared to help their children to work through everything. This might not be easy, but it is necessary.

Parents must remember is that their behavior during the divorce can have a direct impact on the children. When there is a lot of tension and conflict, the kids might have a negative reaction. Finding ways to minimize this can help everyone involved.

Handle disagreements privately

You and your ex should never have tense discussions about anything in front of the children. These should be handled privately so that children don't have to deal with emotions that come with seeing their parents fighting. If you do have to talk about things that might be contentious while the kids are present, be cordial and almost business-like. Not only does this help to deflect the stress from children, it also shows them that being civil toward everyone is a vital adult skill.

Set standards for communication

The methods you use to communicate with your ex might have a part in how the messages are conveyed. If you can't speak to your ex and have to rely on written communication, be careful about how you write out your statements.

Emotional nuances can be lost in writing, so you might write something that seems innocent to you but that comes across as harsh to your ex. It may be necessary to write out your communication and save it then come back and read it later to determine how it could be perceived. You can include standards for communication in your parenting plan.

Place the focus on the children

It is sometimes difficult to move past the factors that led to the divorce. If you get angry when you see your ex, remember that your focus now is the children. Put them first in all the decisions that you make so that you can work toward giving them the life they deserve. Once you get into the habit of doing this, especially when it comes to deciding on the parenting plan terms, you might find that it is much easier to keep it up in the future.

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